Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize