Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
