I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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