i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
