Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
