I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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