Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
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