i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Randomize
