plz talk dirty to me
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
