Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Randomize
