she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
