She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize