dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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