Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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