I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
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