I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
