we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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