evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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