They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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