3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
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