My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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