Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
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