so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize