it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Randomize
