I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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