ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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