It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
