Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
No I am not eating basil off your cock
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Boobs speak an international language.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
