We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
