the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
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