return my video game
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
