Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
