he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
