Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
