it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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