the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
