belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
