the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
