as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
