is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
