no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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