these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Randomize
