1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
