there was a trapeze. enough said
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
