I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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