You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Randomize
