Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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