Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
