10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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