The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
